Part I: The Internet
This Saturday, I attended ROFLThing NYC.

(If you have absolutely no clue what anything you just read means, continue reading.  This post is actually for your benefit more than anyone's.)

Simply put, ROFLThing is a offshoot of ROFLCon, which is a (larger) conference to celebrate the internet and it's memes, which are evolving, typically subversive cultural phenomena.  Rick Roll and lolcats are common memes you've likely experienced yourself, because you are on the internet.  (And if you don't know what ROFL means by now, then there's little hope for you online.)  The conferences are organized, sponsored, and led by - essentially - the content / trend creators, and attended by the people who play in those spaces, who 'get it'.  Read all about it.

I watched the guys behind You Suck at Photoshop describe their experience in a kind of comedic performance piece.  I learned about Sockington the cat and his rise to fame from his owner, Jason Scott, who fascinated me.  I watched some Improv Everywhere videos presented by Charlie Todd, and got a little heart-warmth.  I kind of snoozed through The Future of Online Video from some sponsors.  And then I really snoozed through the presentation about the Comic Sans font from its creator.

All in all it was very fun, and very energizing.  I met some cool people like Charlie Todd, and Dan Rollman, founder of the Universal Record Database.  And I even got up close and personal with Tron Guy, Jay Maynard, who is an awesome and super nice guy.

The end.

Part II: The internets
Now here's what really happened.

In person, I saw the anarchy, the chaos, and the contradiction that is the real internets.

I saw lattes with goatse-shaped foam.

I heard hateful epithets spewed verbally and digitally.

...And then I saw the larger community essentially vote down the epithets, engaging in a feeble system of checks and balances.  (More on this in a minute)

I saw freedom of speech pushed further than I've ever seen in person before.

I saw real products of the human condition.

And while I witnessed negativity - to the degree that I hope no one outside that little world ever has to experience firsthand - I mostly saw productivity and positively stem from the dregs of the web.

(Quick note on the 'hateful epithets'.  Now, sexism, homophobia, and racism are clearly morally wrong.  I'm certainly not going to defend anyone shouting the f-word or the n-word, and I think they're completely unnecessary in any context.  And I realize how sensitive this subject is to just about everyone.  But I will say this: as part of the meme zeitgeists, there is actually context to these words that is not literal or hate-filled.  The words themselves are stripped almost entirely of any original meaning.  So while I too wish these words would just go away, there is an observational takeaway from experiencing it in these bizarre settings.  And this absolutely is a wholly separate topic that deserves conversation - just not for right now.)

Obviously this is all my own perception.  I saw what are the real roots of the internets - which are more anarchist than democratic - take shape and sort of control itself but not really.  Someone organized a conference and people showed up.  Had people acted in person at ROFLThing the way they do online, all of New York City would have disappeared in an instant. The people that attend these conferences, the ones that bring life to these spaces online, are hackers, pranksters, jokers, bullies, thugs, and clowns.  They're consumers, contributors, leaders, observers, and mixers.  Aggregators, owners, collectors, and catalysts.  They're really angry and they're really happy.  They're all of these things at once.

The illusion of control by the organizers could have been shattered with one shout at any time.  Sure, attendees could be physically thrown out for extreme or threatening behavior (what wasn't threatening in some way?).  But in all likelihood the person you throw out for being reckless is exactly the kind of person you want to keep away from their computer, lest you feel their digital wrath.

If you haven't read this New York Times article about trolling online, do so immediately.  And know that moot was present at ROFLThing, as was Anonymous, and likely many faceless others detailed in the article.

There was never any real control to ROFLThing, other than physical brute force.  The best analogy - and it's less analogy and more documented reference - is Fight Club.  ("It's only after you lose everything that you're free to do anything.")  ROFLThing isn't all niceties and pleasantries like a Comic-Con.  Going to ROFLThing was like standing in the midst of a stream of rats, afraid to move and catch too much attention, hoping they just keep flowing past and don't climb your leg.  As an observer, you just don't stick your neck out.

It's this community - and it is a community - that create Big Things online.  And it's the same people that destroy Big Things.  They're there to remind you that the internet is not your favorite blog (erictabone.com, obviously).  It's not your ISP, the media, Google, or even the big brands that think they run the show.  It's 4chan, Anonymous, and scads of unidentifiable others.

Just like Fight Club, they're working under your nose, and you many never even know they were there or what they did.  A meme is born, it's tossed into the mainstream, and they watch it unfold from Oprah's mouth.  (Click that link, watch the video, and know that nobody did what Oprah said, they just fooled her into saying it on TV.  It's a long meme story.  If you're uncomfortable, watch this instead and have a nice roffle.)

Don't be afraid, but definitely be weary.  They will chew you up, spit you out, defile your corpse, slander you posthumously, and laugh all the while.  Why?

For the lulz.

Over the last couple of days, there's been quite the Twitter scare on the interwebs.  It started with direct messages and address spoofing, leading to a sensible Twitter reminder about giving out secret information.  Then, in seemingly unrelated attacks, some high-profile accounts were hacked, which just added to the paranoia and excitement of the whole situation.

So some accounts (mostly celebrities) were forcibly compromised, but most of the civilian casualties were caused by too much trust.  And in this new ...thing, this new social web we live in, there is plenty of trust to go around.  The memory of the internet is short, but have we already forgotten the Age of Viruses & Scams?  In this new Age of Sharing & Utility, there's no shortage of add-on's, such as TwitPic, that require your password to work.  But there's no real security in place for users, so you can only really go on one thing: trust.

2009 is the Year of the Ox in the Chinese zodiac calendar.  According to Wikipedia, for those born under the Ox, "security is their main preoccupation in life" (which would be newborns this year and anyone aged 12, 24, 36, 48, 60, 72, 84, 96, and 108).  Some other traits we can expect out of 2009 and it's Oxen:

• "It is important to remember that the Ox people are sociable and relaxed when they feel secure..."

(This is a caution to all of us white hats in 2009: be not complacent.)

• "Like their animal namesake, the Ox is unswervingly patient, tireless in their work, and capable of enduring any amount of hardship without complaint."

(Ominous of potential black hats.)

So let us continue to rejoice in our social optimism throughout 2009.  Stay bright, stay honest, but remember to continue diligence, thoughtfulness, and caution.